The Walking Dead: Sick, 10/21/12

Daryl orders the prisoners to come out, hands up, as the post-amputation scurry to save Hershel’s life continues. Rick says they need to get him back to the others. Glen finds a gurney to put him on. Theodore opens the cafeteria doors and kills the one zombie that enters. (Wait wtf? Last week a friggin’ horde was outside the doors. It’s only been like two minutes; where’d they go? Continuity FAIL.) They wheel Hershel back the way they came, leaving Danny Trejo, Wyatt Earp, LL Cool J, Little One, and Big One (We never learn the prisoners’ names, ok?), who were expecting a rescue party, standing there hella confused. Eventually, they figure it out and follow. Rick et al. arrive at the cell block. Carol takes over (Omg, I like her so much more this season.) with Hershel, barking orders to get anything that could be used for a bandage, bring pillows to elevate the leg, and don’t do anything crazy to try to stop the bleeding cuz the shock could kill Hershel. Meanwhile, Danny Trejo et al. arrive in the outer area of the cell block, get in a shouting match with Daryl and Theodore, who won’t let them in. After instructing Glenn not to leave Hershel’s side (Read: kill Hershel if he turns.), Rick rushes back to the prisoners, breaks up the fight and informs the clueless bunch that the world as they knew it is no more. They don’t believe him. Rick, Daryl, and Theodore take them outside and show them the zombies, explain what happened, tell them they’re all infected. The prisoners decide they want to stay. Danny and Rick get into a turf war argument. Finally, it’s agreed that in exchange for half the food in the cafeteria, Rick et al. will help Danny et al. clear another cell block to live in.

Glenn sends a distraught Maggie to check on Beth, who’s busy tearing fabric off all of Hershel’s pants so he can walk one-legged in them. Atta girl, Beth! Keep the faith and stay positive. (Also, could you two sing again at some point this season? That was cool.) Rick and Theodore arrive with food. Lori asks about the prisoners; Rick tells her about their agreement. She says don’t hesitate to kill them if he sees fit. Rick says exactly what I’m thinking: “Yeah, you say that now.” In other words, she’s told him to do what he feels necessary before; then when he did it (Killed Shane.), she turned on him. Lori assures him that she knows there’s no malice in his heart and he doesn’t kill just for the sheer joy of life-taking, that he should do whatever he needs to do with a clear conscience. (I’d like to stop here and make two predictions: #1 Rick and Lori are eventually going to reconcile. #2. Rick is going to kill Danny Trejo.) Maggie asks for a few minutes alone with handcuffed-to-the-bed, still-unconscious Hershel; Carol and Glenn leave. Maggie tells her Dad that if it’s too hard to fight, he can let go, then cries on his chest. :( Rick, Daryl, and Theodore hand out weapons and give a crash course in How to Kill The Undead, stressing that Danny et al. don’t make noise, don’t break formation, and aim for the head. They head off into the prison, find some zombies—and the prisoners yell and scream, bumrush the zombies, and start shanking them in the gut. ROFLLLLLL. Rick, Daryl, and Theodore just watch with priceless expressions of incredulity on their faces. I totally have to rewind and watch that bit again. LOL.

As Maggie, Beth, Carol, Lori, and Glenn sit with still-unconscious Hershel, Carl saunters in with a duffel bag full of bandages, bottles of peroxide, and such. He casually announces that he found the infirmary, cleared it out, and oh yeah, killed a couple zombies on the way there and back. Lori, of course, is all like OMFG you can’t just go running off like that; Carl’s all like WTF lady get off my back; Beth’s all like STFU Carl you can’t talk to your mother like that. (I like Beth.) Pissed, Carl runs off … and shockingly, nobody follows him to make sure he’s not going back into zombie territory. (Again—I don’t understand the Carl-Lori feud. At the end of last season, as Rick ranted about how this was no longer a democracy, Carl was crying in Lori’s arms. So what happened? Puberty?) Carol asks Glenn to help her go do something. He’s hesitant to leave Hershel, but Beth, Maggie, and Lori assure him they’ll be ok. Outside, Carol explains that as she’s now the de facto ob-gyn, she needs to practice giving a C-section. (And I'm briefly mad at Lori all over again, cuz she didn't just get preggo, she got preggo knowing full well she couldn't give birth the normal, non-surgery-required way.) Glenn distracts a gaggle of zombies while Carol kills a female one and drags it inside the fence.

Rick and the others find another group of zombies. This time, the prisoners fight as instructed. Alas, Big One gets deep, bloody, zombie scratches on his shoulder. Little One and Wyatt Earp yell at Rick to help Big. Rick says there’s nothing he can do. Danny beats Big to death. Whoa! The group moves on … as Daryl and Rick, disturbed by the fact that Danny totally looked like he did that just for the sheer joy of life-taking, whisper to each other that at the first sign of trouble, they’ll take him out. They reach the cell block, hear a horde of zombies behind the double door entrance. Rick instructs Danny to open one door. Danny not only opens both, releasing the entire almost-too-big-to-control horde, but he also during the melee throws a zombie onto Rick. It knocks him down; Daryl kills it and helps Rick up. Once all the zombies are dead, Rick and Danny stand there sizing each other up for a few seconds—then Ricks swings a machete and lands it in Danny’s head. (Big’s ghost: “Thanks, Rick.) Little takes off running; Rick chases. At gunpoint and at bow and arrowpoint, Daryl and Theodore order LL Cool J and Wyatt Earp down onto their knees. Wyatt, who doesn’t just look but also sounds the part, drawls, “We don’t have no ‘filiation what just happened! Tell 'em, Oscar!” LL—I mean, Oscar just advises him to stop talking. Rick chases Little out into a zombie-filled section of the prison yard, closes the door, and lets the zombies get him.

Maggie, Beth, and Carl (Whew!) sit with Hershel. He stops breathing. Beth freaks, yells for help. Lori comes in, gives Hershel CPR. I admire her willingness to breathe into his might-be-a-zombie mouth. Breath, breath, chest pump, chest pump, breath, brea—ARRRRRRGGGGHHHH! Hershel rises from the dead and grabs her!!! Oh. Wait. He’s still alive; he just woke up from his near-death experience all super dramatically then passed back out. I pause the episode, change my underwear, and continue.

Rick’s about to shoot Wyatt, who drawls that he and Oscar aren’t bad people, please let them live. Rick turns the gun on Oscar, asks what he has to say. Oscar says he’s not begging for his life. (Yeah, Rick. If you’re gonna kill ‘em, just kill ‘em. Don’t needlessly draw this shit out.) Wyatt’s begging worked; Rick, Theodore, and Daryl lead them into the now de-zombied cell block and lock them safely in. Rick, Theodore, and Daryl get back to their cell block just in time to catch Hershel waking up. YAY!!!! Carol misses it cuz she’s outside going full med student on the zombie corpse … as someone watches her from the trees outside the fence. (Omg, who dat? Who dat?) Lori and Rick chat. He puts a hand on her shoulder, tells her that for the record he doesn’t think she’s a bad mother, and thanks her for saving Hershel.

Yes, that was brusque, and then he just walked off, but hey. Baby steps, people. They’ll be sneaking off to the showers for some hot prison sex in no time. *fingers crossed*

Terra Nova, 10/3/11

It’s raining; it’s pouring; the dinosaurs are snoring. Kidding. They’re hiding out in treetops waiting for a rover-load of juicy, delicious Terra Nova (TN) soldiers to get a flat tire. Dinner is served.

Tough-chick Lt. Washington teaches a group of youngsters a Survival Training class — which after last episode probably became mandatory. As the kids learn how to start a fire, tell which direction is north, and find food, Maddy and Hot Soldier keep making googly eyes at each other. After class, Josh gets sent to go de-muck latrines, part of his punishment. Good. That night, Elizabeth and Jim try to have a little husband-wifey time, if you catch my drift, but plans are thwarted first by a screeching dinobird, which Jim shoos away, then by Zoe, who wanted to cuddle. Jim handles it well for a dude who’s been in prison the last two years.


Next morning, Taylor and some soldiers are prepping to head out after the missing supply crew. He sends Jim to the hospital to get a medic to accompany them. Jim interrupts a happy reunion of Elizabeth and Malcolm Wallace, an old school friend. Well — it’s happy until Elizabeth introduces Jim as her husband; Malcolm does a pretty piss-poor job of hiding the fact that he’s not happy to see Jim.


As the soldiers search in the sunny forest, Jim asks Taylor why the Sixers want him dead. Taylor says he doesn’t know (Yeah right. Secret-keeper!); then asks Jim to try to find out just who it is in TN who’s feeding intel to Mira and the Sixers. Which makes sense, cuz the only people Taylor can be sure aren’t dirty moles are the ones who arrived on the very last pilgrimage. Everyone else is suspect. (I'm watching you, Skye.) The soldiers stumble upon the supply crew. They're dead. Like, weirdly dead, with their faces all … chewed.


Back at TN, Josh wanders around the market with Skye, who’s also decked out in latrine-mucking gear. Good. A legless man tries to sell Josh a guitar for “sixty terras” — and I am supremely glad he didn’t say “sixty taylors.” A lesser man might have milked that whole I-was-the-first-settler thing and named the money after himself.


In the hospital, Malcolm (You don’t need to stand that close to Elizabeth, Malcolm.) theorizes that mayhap the dead soldiers were attacked by tree darter snakes? But Jim finds a claw/talon/tooth thingy in a soldier’s clothes; tree darters don’t have claw/talon/tooth thingies. Elizabeth has to stay and autopsy, so Jim has to play Mr. Mom for the night, cooking dinner and stressing over Maddy’s crush. It was cute. That night, he and Elizabeth try once more for some husband-wifey time but are again interrupted (DAMMIT!) by a screeching dinobird. Josh (who, I’m happy to see, is way less angsty and much more agreeable. Thank you, near-death experience.) heads outside with Jim to shoo it away. But it’s not an it; it’s a whole flock, and they attaaaaaaaaaaaack! Jim and Josh make it inside, but not before one chews on Jim’s hand — leaving a claw/talon/tooth thingy.

Malcolm wants a science team to observe the creatures, which aren’t birds but reptiles, some new breed of terrasaur. Taylor says since they’ve killed three people and attacked two more, he’s declaring a moratorium on anybody leaving TN til the reasons behind the attacks are understood. Malcolm, who really wants to get his science geek on, walks off in a huff. Yeah, nothing’s more annoying than somebody telling you you can’t put yourself in harm’s way. Oh — then we learn why Malcolm was so shocked to see Jim. Jim asks Taylor how Elizabeth got selected to come to TN. Taylor tells him Malcolm submitted her name. HA! So when Malcolm heard that the husband of that hot chick he used to date in college, his one that got away, was in prison, he was all, “This is my chance!” and pulled some strings to get her sent to TN, hoping they could rekindle the flame. Yeah, not so much.


Out in the busy marketplace, without warning, hundreds of the birdasaurs suddenly attaaaaaaaaaaaack! Eventually, Lt. Washington, Malcolm, and Taylor figure out that TN was built on their breeding ground — OOPS — and that millions more are headed there to spawn. Malcolm and Elizabeth request a pair be captured alive. As Jim and some soldiers head out to catch them, Jim tells Malcolm he knows the real reason Malcolm wanted Elizabeth on TN. Malcolm goes all stuttering sputtering super geek — which means Jim’s right.


Skye waits out the invasion at the Shannon household, which Hot Soldier has switched with some other soldier to guard. Jim, utilizing his well-developed powers of observation, notices this. At the lab, Malcolm and Elizabeth race to isolate and duplicate dinobird pheromones to be used to lure the critters away from TN. Once the ‘mones are ready, Taylor and Jim load them into a big vat, load the vat into a rover, and drive away, millions of screeching dinobirds hot on their tail.


As the sun comes up, they return, tired and bloody but ok. Lt. Washington seems *very* happy to see Taylor; he affectionately calls her “Wash.” Are they a thing? (Am I jealous?) Everyone heads off to get some shut-eye after the long, harrowing night (Jim and Elizabeth get some husband-wifey time. YAY!) … but not before Malcolm says that “Malcolmus Terrasauria” has been successfully relocated. *sigh* If he had been the first settler, that guitar would cost “sixty malcolms.” :(

I don’t like him, but I don’t think he’s the mole. He’s too busy taking plant samples. And Skye's too busy buying guitars for Josh. You know who I think it is? Hot Soldier. BE CAREFUL, MADDY.