Project Runway, 9/29/11

It’s a 70s challenge!

But wait, you exclaim. Didn’t we just do that (sort of) last week? Tim clarifies for us: “Sophisticated 70s inspired. Not vintage, not retro.” And then he gets in a dig at the awfulness the designers made in the previous episode: “We all remember what happened with the last challege — too literal!” Yes we do, and yes it was. :( The winning design of this challenge will be sold on piperlime.com.

Off to Mood! Where somehow, Anya loses her money. A frantic search takes place. YEAH RIGHT. Somebody found that $100, pocketed it, and was out of there before you can say “I’m a thief.” Tim informs Anya she can use whatever $ the others have leftover after making their purchases (that would be all of $11.50 from Anthony Ryan), and muslin, but that’s it.
She starts crying. Arrrrgh. Look, unless it’s over a dying family member, I HATE CRYING. I’m not heartless; I get that having next to no fabric to work with will be hard. But this is your chance to score some extra points. Make Michael Kors trill, “I can’t believe you made that gorgeous dress out of nothing but muslin!” Back in the workroom, though, Anya eventually dries her tears and gets to work with fabric dye and muslin. Do it, girl! And let me say: I LOVE her hand tattoo. I might have to copy that …

Viktor shows why he’s on my Please Don’t Win list: all the other designers are giving Anya what fabric they have left over, but he refuses because “this is a competition, and I want to help her, but I can’t.” JERK.

The next morning, Tim enters — and the designers immediately suspect he’s bringing bad news. He is! They have to make a second look, a one-piece garment. They get only $50 bucks. “Anya, don’t lose that money!” Tim warns her as everyone runs around Mood. Lol. Way ahead of you, Tim. She has it pinned to her shirt. During the walk-through, Tim alerts Laura Kathleen to the fact that Nina questions Laura Kathleen’s taste level. I already knew that. From my recap of the season premiere: “And please note that Laura Kathleen totally rubbed Nina the wrong way.” So we’re what, like, nine episodes in, and Nina still doesn’t like Laura Kathleen’s clothes. Good. Cuz she’s on my Please Don’t Win list, too.

Runway:
I kind of have an eye orgasm when Kimberly’s one-piece pantsuit comes out. Please let her win so I can buy it on piperlime! Well — if it’s got an inseam long enough for a 6’2” giantess, that is. It better come in extra-long, Kimberly. Bert picked a pretty fabric, but underneath it, his model’s shorts showed the bottom third of her ass cheeks. That’s always so annoying to me. Unless you’re going to the beach, or you're prostituting, where the hell could you wear those???? Anya’s $11.50 look is amazing. Hell, it looks better than all the $100 looks (except Kimberly's pantsuit). I will be quite happy if Anya, Kimberly, or Anthony Ryan wins. Joshua, Viktor, and Laura Kathleen are on my … well, you know by now.


Kimberly is safe; she didn’t win. BUT I WANTED THAT JUMPSUIT. :( Laura Kathleen is in the bottom. The fabric of her shirt and skirt don’t match, and her one-piece is blah boring. Viktor is in the top. I like his jacket, but not his dress or pants. Nobody likes Joshua’s looks. How could they? My god, THOSE PANTS!!! :( His stuff is bad, bad, bad, and he gets mad at Heidi when she tells him so. *eye roll* Anya’s looks are a hit. YAY! And her severely limited budget adds to the impressiveness. Anthony Ryan’s looks are “hippie sister wives.” Eek. Bert’s go over well, though Nina says she’d wear the top with something other than those shorts. Lol.



The designers leave the runway so the judges can deliberate, and Joshua gets on everybody’s nerves by blaming his crappedy fug on the fact that he didn’t live through the 70s. Um … like practically nobody in that room did except for Bert, yet they for the most part managed to get it right, Josh. Just admit you made bad clothes.

Anya wins! Yaaaaaaaay! See what happens when you stop wasting time crying and get down to biz? You go, girl. Bert's dress is so cute that it’s going to be sold, too. I liked that. After all, he lived through this era. Joshua and Anthony Ryan are the bottom two. I hold my breath … DAMMIT. Anthony Ryan goes home. :( Stay awesome, Anthony Ryan.

And now, to piperlime to check the price of Anya’s clothes … and the inseams.